Anger

Anger is an interesting thing.

I had a perfectly valid reason to be angry with someone today, and yet bit my tongue to avoid a further argument.

So, I let it fester, then I was mad at myself for no good reason that I could identify, and managed to give myself a migraine over it.

Then after sleeping off the migraine, I apologized to the person that I was angry at because I was angry at them--not that what they did didn't tick me off, because it did, but because I was mad at them.

Then I felt better.

What the heck?

Just once, in my humanness, I want to be angry at someone in order for it to actually make a difference in their behavior that made me upset instead of me being the one to feel guilt!

(In this particular situation, discussing the behavior that needs to modified after anger dissipates is fruitless)

In my being "so beside myself" over this today, of course, I was directed to the right passage to put me into check with how I should be behaving. Ephesians 4 says, "Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace." (vv. 2-3) "In your anger do not sin" Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need. Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." (vv. 26-32)

And 2 Timothy 2:22-26: "Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart. Don't have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. And the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will."

Yep, turn to scripture study to try to be vindicated in my feelings, and get taught a lesson instead.

So much to learn in life...no one ever said the road to holiness was a smooth one. Some days it's an easy stroll, and others it's one step forward and two steps back.

If you can't say anything nice...

...don't say anything at all.

In a poopy mood. Completely exhausted. So much has gone on this week. Just tired and cranky. Feels like everything I've done this week has taken more effort than it has needed and I'm so far behind. Not at all happy with myself.

Anyone looking for a job? Administrative assistant with social work experience needed--salary: my undying love and gratitude.

Time to attempt to cook dinner...then sleep. Laundry can wait.

Silence

Not much to report today--typical Monday. Planning on "fasting" from the internet tomorrow (other than corps related usage). See ya in a few days.

What's My Place?

I don't like change.

Quite some time ago, I was convicted deeply that I need to spend more time in keeping up my home--you know, laundry, dishes, cooking, cleaning, etc. My husband and I have been pretty good at splitting those duties 50/50 so far. I'm not one that subscribes completely to the little wife at home mantra, but I do feel that I do have a prominent role in house making and that my husband is the the head of the household.

I had a bit of a domesticated mood today...when we got home from church, I sat down and planned out our meals for the week, made a grocery list, cleaned out the fridge (a few science experiments), went grocery shopping, cooked lunches for us to take to the corps for the week, and did the dishes.

It's been awhile...no one told me household duties were so exhausting. Give me paperwork and sermon prep any day.

But, the bottom line is that if this is what God intends for me, then He's going to pave the path to get me where He wants me to be as long as I'm paying attention.

It's going to be a wild ride...

Proverbs 12:4 says, "A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones."

Yikes...that's a lot to live up to.